Alfred F. Jones (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
asapplepie) wrote2013-05-10 07:39 pm
asapplepie) wrote2013-05-10 07:39 pm
Entry tags:
day five, america and england
[He's still wiping tears away when he leads England back to his cabin to talk. He's glad to talk to England, even if England won't like what he might have to say, because this way they can protect more people.
His room has gotten messy again, though he's spent most of his nights pacing in the dark rather than managing to actually sleep. But he locks the door behind them.]
His room has gotten messy again, though he's spent most of his nights pacing in the dark rather than managing to actually sleep. But he locks the door behind them.]
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[Despite the harshness of his words, the hands he puts on America's shoulders are gentle as he looks directly into his eyes.]
Listen to me. None of this is your fault. I can't even say it's the hunters, not after Poland and Wayne. It's that fucking Critter's, all of it. You're not a coward for wanting to save your 300 million people. Kanaya is dead because she got dragged into this awful game. It had nothing to do with you. I'm sorry she's gone, but I'll be even sorrier if that's what convinces you to risk your life.
You alone have the power to come out of this alive, America. Use it. Bravery has nothing to do with it. Anyone else would do the same in your shoes.
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The scavenger...I mean, they've been really good about finding hunters. They probably know I didn't mean anything by it, right?
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[He looks up again; his face is still red and tear-streaked, but he's a little calmer.]
Please, just tell me the truth. I can make my own decisions, England. I just want to know what I'm really risking, whatever I decide.
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[It comes out as a muffled scream as England buries his own face into his hands. He's regrets the outburst the second it comes out - for all his bouts of shallow rage, he's rarely ever genuinely emotional, not to the point of breaking down. And lucky him, America gets to see it twice.
But he can't do this anymore. He hadn't been as upset as the others when he found out his role; he's more than used to manipulating people in the shadows and being hated for it, and this was for a better cause than most of what he's done over the centuries. But lying to America, taking advantage of his absolute faith when he's already been betrayed by someone he idolized, risking his life just to win this stupid fucking game (to bring everyone back) - even though he knows the chances of the scavengers killing America are slim, he'd been so intent on a way for the hunters to win that he hadn't even thought of it until he said it. What the hell is he turning into? He's always been upfront about his lack of moral integrity, but this...he doesn't even know if he's doing this to save everyone or just for the sake of victory anymore.
He can't keep lying to America. He has to. Part of him just wants his role to be revealed already so he doesn't have to keep playing.
When he looks up again, his eyes are dry but completely drained.]
I don't know either. You seem to think I have all the answers - I don't. Maybe if it were anyone else, I'd tell them that the scavenger will likely go after someone else, but I can't tell you that. I am actually the last person you should be asking, because I honestly don't care about winning or losing anymore. I just want you to be safe.
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[He's genuinely shocked by the response. He hadn't thought about how much he was asking England to do and figure out, and how much he's worrying him.
He wants to be brave, and maybe even more, he wants people to think he's brave. But England almost never gets like this. He's sort of touched that even after all these years, England still cares so much, but he's even more guilty.]
It's...it's okay. Thanks for being honest with me.
Look...Ema and Ukyo will both probably be fine, right? So I'll protect myself tonight and then the scavenger will leave me alone and I can protect them a different night.
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Even I don't believe you on that. Forget it. I should have never shown you that bloody note in the first place. Ukyo was probably lying to me anyway.
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I shouldn't of lied before, okay? You and me gotta trust each other, so it won't happen again.
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[He's calmer now, though in a flat way, the calm that comes after simply no longer having any energy to care anymore.]
Be honest. Do you want to win this game? Or do you want to get out of it with all of us countries alive?
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I want both. We're going to all get out of here, and stick it to Critter, too.
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Then pick Ukyo Kunoji tonight. Don't listen to my selfishness. We need to protect all the useful roles we can, even if we're not sure of them yet. The scavenger will most likely be going after Holden Caulfeld, Beat or Togami tonight. That's who I'd be aiming for if I were trying to kill a hunter, not someone who was obviously just trying to protect someone he admired. They didn't try to kill Joshua after all, even though he lead the vote away from a hunter.
[He doesn't even care how suspicious he sounds - he's not breaking any rules, and it might be a relief to have America figure it out.]
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...Okay! Will do!
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I'm going to do whatever I can to get us all out of here safely, okay? You shouldn't trust me on anything else, but trust me on that.
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[England's being a little weird, with all this focus on not trusting him, but it's hard to tell what England thinks and he doesn't really want to dwell on it.]
Well, I don't trust you not to be a douchebag! But I guess I trust you on important stuff.
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And I don't trust you not to be an idiot, but I'll trust that you'll be on my side every step of the way. We're going to win this game, we're going to rescue Poland's people, and then I'm going to rip that mask off Critter's face, rip all its stinking teeth out one by one, then set every single stupid fucking trophy head on fire, shove them down its throat, and make it swallow. And after that, I'll start getting creative.
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Jesus. But you're right, Critter pissed off the wrong people.
By the way...no matter what happens...I promised Bruce Wayne I'd protect his kid. And I'm not gonna break that promise, okay?
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That's fine. I'm not going to let Luke Triton, Clara Oswald, or Peggy Carter die either. We all have promises we can't break here. [The promise for everyone to live, the promise to get everyone out safely...that's the one he needs to keep.]
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Well...don't worry, because I'm going to get us out of here for sure.